My mom
Monster Jam 2015: Who's going to be there?!

These are my legs

My legs

My legs are not pretty.  They never have been.  I have terrible skin due to psoriasis.  I've had knee surgery over twenty years ago that left a keyloid scar and a strange squishy bump on my left leg.  I've got spider veins coursing throughout every inch.  I bruise at the slightest touch.  When I shave, I have red spots everywhere.  When I don't shave, my hair is way darker than I thought possible.  My legs are not pretty.

But it's hot out.  And I want to wear shorts.  So I will.

Why am I writing about it?  Because it's important.  Well, to me at least.

The other day when I was about to go for a run, I noticed the temperature was pretty high on our thermometer.  I debated putting on shorts because, well, ...my legs.  I thought about how weird I would look out there running on these ugly limbs.  

But then the heat hit me and the thought of wearing pants flew right out the window.  I put on my shorts and headed out.

As I was running, I looked down at my legs to see just how terrible they looked down there.

All I saw were two powerful stems carrying me forward.  Each stride pushing me to my destination.  Every step making those legs even stronger.  I forgot all about the "ugly" exterior of my legs and focused on the muscles beneath.  The joints that moved me along.  The way they held me up even when the rest of me was ready to stop.

Yes, it's a metaphor for outer vs. inner beauty.   Yes, I want to relay this message to my daughter and let her know beauty isn't skin deep.  All that.

But the other day's run was really mostly for me.  

I'M the one who needs to remember that it's OK to show even the "ugly" parts of me.  I need to be OK with it.  I need to know that even when I don't like how my legs look, and they won't get me any leg modeling jobs, they are still there to help me put my best foot forward whether I cover them up or not.

So I'm not going to cover them up.  I am sorry if the sight of them makes you cringe, but frankly I have reached a point where my self esteem has to trump what others think.  These puppies carried me to where I am today which is at the helm of a wonderful family with my fantastic husband right next to me.  

I don't want to start any revolution or insist that others join me in some shorts wearing crusade.  But maybe take a minute to think about some part of you that you have been covering up for no reason.  Ask yourself why.  Maybe revealing it could make you even stronger than you already are.

 

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