As promised, here is my honest account of how things went yesterday.
I want to start this post by saying how I feel today: I feel 100% fine! As if I had not undergone any type of procedure yesterday at all. I am writing this at 8:00 AM. I know this feeling may be fleeting as the day goes on, so I will take it easy today. But as of right now, I am surprisingly AOK.
My doctor said everything went very well. There were no issues and the procedure went smoothly. I have to see him in two weeks.
Yesterday is sort of blurry in my memory due to the anesthesia, but I will tell you all that I remember. The procedure itself went rather quickly. I remember seeing 10:00 on the clock of the operating room and then I was asleep. I then woke up in the recovery room and the clock said 11:12.
I immediately felt pain in my abdomen. It wasn't terrible pain, but enough to get my attention. It was a sort of dull pain throughout with a slightly sharper pain in my left side. Because I felt that pain, I got worried that it would get worse as the medication wore off. On the contrary, it subsided as the day went on. By the time I went to bed at 11:00 last night, I was just a little bit crampy - like I normally feel the day of my heaviest flow each time.
When the anesthesia fog started to lift, I checked under the blankets to see what everything looked like. There was very minimal spotting. Throughout the day yesterday, there was only one or two spots. This morning I am wearing a pad as a precaution, but so far it has not been needed. I will probably wear one for the next few days to be safe.
The physical part of the procedure was very easy. The worst part about it was the anesthesia which nauseated me and left me feeling hungover all day. What I was not prepared for though was how I was going to feel emotionally.
When I was wheeled back into the area where my husband was sitting, something came over me. A wave of sadness overtook me. I couldn't contain myself from crying. I know it was partially from the anesthesia, but it was also something else. It hit me like a ton of bricks right at that moment that I could no longer carry a child.
My husband and I had decided long ago that we were done having children. It was absolutely no surprise that this procedure would prevent just that. But the finality of it struck me like a blow to the chest when I woke up. A rush of thoughts flooded my brain. Did I make the right choice?
As the day went on, I noticed that sadness slowly going away. You know that whole 'when a door closes, another one opens' adage? Well, I started to feel the other door opening inch by inch with every hour. I could see how much better things are going to be now that I don't have to worry about all the issues I was having with my periods before. I felt lighter and more free.
Today I feel like a brand new woman. All that sadness from yesterday is gone. I think I needed that cry as a type of closure. It helped me to accept the changes I made to my body and move on to this next part of my life.
I will post again in a week to let you all know how everything is progressing. I hope this is helpful to anyone who may be considering the procedure!
Here are links to the rest of the series: